Been blogging my way through the 7 Essential Attitudes of Mindfulness and how it applies to your life and your beach volleyball game. Attitude #1 is Beginner’s Mind - read more about that HERE! Attitude #2 is non-judgment - read more HERE. Attitude #3 is arguably the hardest and yet most obvious one - PATIENCE. We all know what patience means, but do we really KNOW what it means - you know? Patience is the ability to handle discomfort or difficulty with calmness and self-control. Patience is emotional maturity. It’s the wherewithal to maintain composure when your inner self wants to react. This week, I’m focusing on my ability to be patient.

Why is patience important? Self-control and emotional maturity look like holding your tongue when you want to say something you shouldn’t, breathing when you feel your emotions overwhelming you, understanding that you don’t always get what you want [ever] or in the time that you want it. Patience will help you be a happier person, a more fun person to be around, a better friend and a better beach volleyball partner. This one is so important, we are breaking it down into PART 1 [patience for yourself] PART 2 [patience for your teammates], and PART 3 [patience as a coach].

Want to be more patient? We work on this in my Mindset Coaching Program.

Patience Part 1: How to be a patient player.

Have you seen a patient beach volleyball player? What comes to mind when you visualize that kind of play? It looks effortless, easy, smooth, and free. Have you seen an impatient beach volleyball player? Quite the opposite - these players usually make quick, jerky movements, unforced errors and have very obvious emotional ups and downs. Patience on and off the court requires self-awareness and maturity. Awareness of impatience is the best way to cultivate patience. Maturity comes from awareness of the self-centered part of ourselves looking to take over - impatience and immaturity demands that things be a certain way at a certain time, patience and maturity recognizes that things need to unfold in their own time and in their own way.

Read below to find:.

How to practice this mindset.
How to apply it to volleyball.
Journal question prompts.

How to practice PATIENCE

Practice physical patience. Practice makes perfect - find a way to make yourself physically uncomfortable, and work on sitting it out. One simple way that works for me - Yin Yoga. Nothing makes you more antsy than sitting in a slightly uncomfortable stretch for longer than you want to. Try Frog Pose for 5 minutes - settle into the pose until you are slightly uncomfortable (right on the edge, but not so far as that you feel PAIN). The more comfortable you get with being uncomfortable, the more patient you will be.
Practice emotional patience. This one is a little tougher. When you notice yourself in situations that make you upset, angry, or fearful - the first step is cultivating self-awareness of that emotional reaction. When you feel an emotional reaction coming, practice taking 10 deep breaths - 3 full seconds in the inhale, 3 full seconds on the exhale. How does this change your experience?
Accept your impatience. Change can’t happen without acceptance. Start to become aware of the times that you are impatient, and begin to settle in. Is your mind calm or irritated? What ways are you rushing yourself or others? What situations do you tend to find yourself impatient with and how can you practice responding more patiently?

How to be a patient volleyball PLAYER.

Now for the good stuff - the hardest quality in this sport is recognizing that you can’t force anything - the game will unfold on its own time, and trying to create something that’s not there will never work.

Patience on defense. No matter what you know or how well you scout a team, you can never fully predict what will happen at the moment. One of the hallmarks of a veteran player is a player who doesn’t feel the need to force anything on defense - because you can’t! Next time you feel frustrated on defense, try these three things:
- Try less hard. A lot of beach players try way too hard, way too often. The beach game is simple. Sit low on defense and WAIT. See what IS happening, and let go of your need to predict what you want to happen.
- Play lazy. Next time you practice, see how you can play the laziest, most efficient volleyball possible. Take the fewest steps, move the least, while still giving ‘max’ effort. How does this change the way you play?
- Practice reaction. The next opportunity you have on the court, practice playing defense on 100% reaction only. Sit in the hole where your defense positioning is, and practice being patient enough to let the ball completely leave the hitter’s hand before leaving on defense - what happens on defense when you are consistently LATE. Practice waiting to start your approach until the ball is coming down from its apex - what happens to your game when you are consistently LATE on your approach? Early = impatience, so late = extra patience - practice the extreme version of patience, and see how it changes your game.
Patience on Offense. Patient offensive player - approach hard and in the same way with no-expectations, see what is happening, and hit the ball accordingly. Impatient offensive player - over-anticipating what the other team thinks you will hit, leading to a non-confident swing or unforced error. To be more patient on offense, practice these things:
- Choose your offense strategy early. Choose before the game or practice what your plan is. Am I going to attack the defender, the blocker, or the open court? Stick with that plan for a side-switch or two, and evaluate if it’s working based on what is happening. Having a plan pre-decided before the game makes it easier to be patient on the court!
- Approach the same no matter what. This one has been drilled into every beach player - approach slow = shot, approach hard = hit. How can you practice a simple, repeatable, consistent approach that looks the same and allows you to hit or shoot?
Patience on serve & pass.
- Patient Serving. Try less hard! If you’re serving this team down the middle and it’s working, patience looks like not letting the other team off the hook - keep serving there! Try less hard means that you’re not going for aces every single time you serve. This strategy usually leads to unforced errors. A patient server is someone who is consistent, takes chances when it makes sense, and keeps the pressure on the other team.
- Patient Serve Receive. Patient serve receive looks relaxed. You’re totally not in a rush, not over-thinking, and patiently waiting for the server to do their thing. Have you ever been in a situation where the server is taking their SWEET time to get to the line and serve? What if you know they’re doing it on purpose just to bother you? How can you practice your patience here? Focus on the positive - how much you love playing, how much you enjoy being on the court, and having the opportunity to even play (especially after 2020 :D).

Reflection Questions

What area of my game do I struggle with patience the most? What things can I do to practice changing this?
What area of my life on and off the court do I struggle to keep emotional control? How does this make me feel?
What are some times that I feel upset when I don’t get what I want in the time that I want it? How would I like to respond in those situations?

Learn more about what my coaching programs can do for your life by reading what it’s done for others HERE.

Follow along on Instagram to see how I’m practicing mindfulness in my life and in competition!